by EM2WL | Nov 3, 2025 | Fat Loss / Cutting
How Lean Do You Need to Be to See Muscle Tone? (Women Over 40)
Most women who lift weights want to see the payoff of their hard work. They want visible muscle definition—the toned, sculpted look that says, “Yes, I lift.”
But here’s the truth: building muscle and seeing muscle are not the same thing. You can be strong and still look soft. The missing piece? Body fat percentage.
So how lean do you really need to be to look toned? Let’s break it down.
The Body Fat % Sweet Spot for Visible Muscle
There’s no single number where your muscles magically “pop.” But for most women, visible muscle tone starts to show between 20–26% body fat.
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Around 26%, you’ll usually see softer outlines—muscles show up more when flexed or pumped.
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Closer to 20%, definition becomes clearer: deeper lines, shape at rest, and muscles that look strong without flexing.
Important note: These are guidelines, not rules. How visible your muscle looks depends on:
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Your muscle mass (more muscle = more definition at higher body fat %)
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Genetics and fat distribution (where your body stores fat first/last)
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Skin elasticity and age-related changes (why two women at the same % may look different)
The bottom line: Don’t obsess over the number. Aim for the look you want, not the math.
Why Chasing “Too Lean” Can Backfire
Social media and fitness magazines often glorify women with shredded abs, striated shoulders, and stage-ready physiques. But here’s the reality:
That look is temporary—and often unsustainable.
Pushing body fat too low can cause:
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Low energy and constant fatigue
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Hormonal disruptions (especially for women in peri/post-menopause)
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Poor recovery and higher injury risk
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Muscle loss instead of muscle gain
In other words: chasing “stage lean” can leave you weaker, more tired, and less defined in the long run.
How to Find Your Sweet Spot
So, how do you know when you’re lean enough to see muscle definition?
1. Get a DEXA Scan (if possible)
DEXA scans are one of the most accurate ways to measure body fat percentage and lean mass. Most women are shocked by the results—because we often underestimate how high our body fat percentage really is.
2. Pay Attention to Real-World Markers
Numbers are tools, not the destination. Look at:
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How your clothes fit
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Changes in progress photos
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Your strength in the gym
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Energy, recovery, and overall well-being
A woman at 24% with solid muscle may look far more defined than a woman at 21% with less muscle.
3. Aim for Balance, Not Extremes
The sweet spot is where your muscle is visible and you still feel strong, fueled, and healthy. For most women, that’s somewhere between 20–26% body fat.
The Takeaway
If you’ve been lifting and wondering why you don’t “look like you lift,” it may not be your training. It may be your body fat percentage hiding the muscle you’ve already built.
But remember:
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You don’t need to chase extreme leanness to see definition.
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Visible muscle is about the balance of fat loss, muscle mass, and realistic expectations.
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For most women, the sweet spot is 20–26% body fat.
Want help creating a roadmap to get there (without starving yourself or falling into the yo-yo trap? Book a call and we’ll point you in the right direction.
Prefer to DIY? Check out The Look Like You Lift System for the strategy, guidance, and tools you need to build muscle and see it.
by EM2WL | Oct 28, 2025 | Building Muscle, Bulk, Strength Training
The Real Reason You Feel ‘Bulky’ When You Lift Weights
“I want to lift weights, but I don’t want to get bulky.”
Raise your hand if you’ve ever said (or thought) that.
You’re not alone. The fear of getting too big, too puffy, or looking “manly” from lifting heavy has held so many women back from the results they actually want.
But here’s the truth: Lifting heavy doesn’t make you bulky.
What does? That’s where it gets interesting.
Where the “Bulky” Fear Comes From
For decades, women have been told to tone, sculpt, lengthen, and… “lose.” We’ve been marketed workouts that promise results with light weights and high reps—all in the name of looking lean, not “too muscular.”
But here’s the reality: muscle doesn’t grow on accident.
Those women you see with significant muscle mass? They didn’t just pick up a 25-lb dumbbell and wake up looking like a bodybuilder.
Building visible muscle takes years of intentional work—and often, a caloric surplus, high training volume, and specific rep ranges.
Lifting heavy for 8-12 reps (the sweet spot for hypertrophy) without the proper nutrition won’t magically bulk you up. It will, however, help you look lean, strong, and defined when combined with the right phase-based strategy.
So Why Do You Feel Bigger?
If you’ve started lifting and felt puffier, clothes fit tighter, or the scale went up…you’re not imagining it. But you’re also not gaining slabs of muscle overnight.
Here’s what could be happening:
- You’re eating in a surplus without matching your protein intake or monitoring body fat gain.
- You’re new to lifting, and your muscles are inflamed and storing more water.
- You’re not alternating fat loss and building phases strategically.
Muscle may weigh more by volume than fat, but it’s denser, tighter, and firmer. What often gets misread as “bulk” is actually fat gain sitting on top of new muscle.
What To Do Instead
If you’re worried about getting bulky, here’s the smarter approach:
- Dial in your rep ranges. Stay in the 8-12 rep range for most lifts. Go heavier progressively, not aggressively.
- Track your protein. Undereating protein while lifting is one of the quickest ways to feel puffy.
- Train in phases. Alternate between muscle-building phases and fat-loss phases.
- Measure more than the scale. Take progress photos, measurements, and watch how your clothes fit.
Watch the Full Breakdown Here
In this YouTube video, I break it all down:
- Why lifting heavy won’t make you bulky
- What will make you feel puffy (and how to avoid it)
- How to train smarter with phase-based lifting
The Real Reason You Feel ‘Bulky’ When You Lift Weights
Want a Plan That Respects Your Body and Your Goals?
If you want to get strong, defined, and build muscle strategically (without looking bulky), check out the EM2WL Training App.
Inside, you’ll get:
- A full year of periodized strength plans
- Video guidance + macros advice
- Real talk from a coach who’s been where you are
Let’s ditch the fear and build muscle with purpose.light weights and high repsspecific rep rangesprogress photos
by EM2WL | Apr 18, 2025 | Strength Training
Why Lifting Heavy Isn’t Working for You (3 Mistakes to Fix ASAP)
So you’re lifting heavy. You’re doing the work. You’re showing up consistently.
But your body? It’s not changing.
What gives?
Here’s the truth: lifting heavy is powerful, but it’s not a magic pill. And if it feels like it isn’t working for you, chances are you’re making one (or more) of these 3 common mistakes.
Mistake #1: You’re Not Progressively Overloading
Lifting the same weights year after year might keep you from sliding backward, but it won’t move you forward.
Your body needs a reason to adapt. A reason to grow.
Progressive overload is the key. And it doesn’t just mean lifting heavier (though that helps). You can also:
- Increase your reps
- Add more sets
- Slow down the tempo (hello, negatives!)
- Track your workouts so you know when you’re actually improving
If your body isn’t being challenged, it has no reason to change.
Mistake #2: You’re Lifting Heavy While Undereating
Muscle doesn’t grow without fuel. Period.
A lot of women are eating far too little while training hard—whether it’s from tracking apps that set your calories too low, point systems that prioritize weight loss over nourishment, or intermittent fasting plans that inadvertently slash your intake.
Your body is being asked to build while being starved. It’s like firing the entire construction crew and still expecting the house to be built.
Calories are your workers. Protein is your bricks. No fuel = no gains.
Mistake #3: You’re Not Recovering Enough
Muscle doesn’t grow during workouts. It grows between them.
And recovery becomes even more critical as we age. That means:
- Rest between sets (stop rushing!)
- Full rest days (no, walking isn’t cheating)
- Deload or recovery weeks
- Prioritizing sleep, hydration, and stress reduction
If you’re constantly pushing but never recovering, you’re not getting stronger. You’re just getting exhausted.
Watch the Full Breakdown:
Why Lifting Heavy Isn’t Working (And How to Fix It)
We dive into:
- The 4 ways to apply progressive overload
- How undereating quietly sabotages your gains
- Why “no days off” is killing your results
Want a Training Plan That Does It Right?
The EM2WL Training App is designed for women who want to get strong, defined, and fueled properly. Inside, you get:
- Structured progressive overload
- Built-in rest & deload weeks
- Video guidance + macros coaching
- A smarter path to long-term results
Ready to stop spinning your wheels? Check out the app here
And if you’re brand new to the Eat More 2 Weigh Less method, start with the Quick Start Guide. It’ll help you figure out how much you should be eating—and why that number might surprise you.
by EM2WL | Mar 26, 2025 | Testimonials
How Eating More Helps With Weight Loss
“I Thought My Body Was Broken…”
Stephanie was doing everything right—or so she thought.
She was doing keto, working out, and following all the diet rules. But instead of getting results, she felt exhausted, weak, and stuck.
At her lowest point, she could barely push her baby’s stroller without feeling like she’d collapse.
That’s when she realized something had to change.
The Shift That Changed Everything
Instead of cutting more, Stephanie made a bold move: she ate more.
Not just a little more—but thousands more calories than she ever thought possible while still losing fat.
She reset her metabolism instead of wrecking it further.
She built strength instead of punishing herself with cardio.
She lost 54 lbs while eating 2500+ calories a day—and over 250g of carbs!
Yes, you read that right.
Breaking Free from the Dieting Cycle
For years, Stephanie thought that eating less was the only way to lose weight.
But here’s what she discovered instead:
✅ Low calories = Low metabolism. Dieting for years slowed her body down.
✅ Eating more = Energy + Strength. Fueling her body allowed her to finally see results.
✅ More protein, more carbs, no starvation. She wasn’t just losing weight—she was getting stronger.
And the best part?
She didn’t do a single minute of cardio to lose the weight.
Yes, eating MORE helps with weight loss … no, you don’t have to overcompensate by adding cardio!
How She Pushed Past the Fear of Eating More
Let’s be honest—increasing calories is terrifying when you’ve been told your whole life that less is better.
Stephanie felt all of those fears, too.
❌ “What if I gain even more weight?”
❌ “What if my metabolism is too slow to handle it?”
❌ “What if this doesn’t work?”
But she trusted the process. And after months of fueling her body the right way, the fat started coming off—without starvation, without exhaustion, and without spending hours on a treadmill.
Now? She’s feeling lighter, stronger, and more confident than ever.
If you’ve ever felt stuck, frustrated, or afraid to eat more, Stephanie’s story will change the way you see weight loss forever.
Watch the full interview to see exactly what she did
by EM2WL | Mar 20, 2025 | Motivation
Should You Do Workouts You Hate? The Truth About Motivation & Results
Be Honest—Do You Actually Enjoy Your Workouts?
If you’ve ever forced yourself through a workout you hated because you thought it was the only way to get results, you’re not alone.
A lot of women—especially over 40—believe they have to do certain workouts, even when they dread every second. Running, HIIT, barre, Pilates… if you’ve ever thought, “I need to do this because it burns the most calories”—you’re not crazy. But you might be setting yourself up for failure.
So let’s break it down: Should you do workouts you don’t like? Or is there a better way to reach your goals?
The #1 Reason People Think They Have to Do Certain Workouts
A common belief in fitness is that more pain = more progress.
That’s why so many women force themselves through workouts they hate, thinking:
✅ “Running is the best way to lose weight.”
✅ “HIIT burns the most calories, so I need to suffer through it.”
✅ “If I want to tone, I have to do Pilates, even though I hate it.”
But here’s the reality check: You don’t need to do workouts you hate just because they’re trendy or seem ‘effective.’
If you force yourself to do something miserable, how long will you actually stick with it?
And more importantly—is that workout even helping you reach your goal?
Should You Force Yourself to Do Workouts You Hate?
The real answer? It depends.
Not all workouts are created equal. Some will give you the best results, even if they aren’t your absolute favorite. But others? If they’re making you miserable and they don’t align with your goals, why bother?
Here’s a simple 3-Category Framework to help you decide what’s worth keeping:
1️⃣ Workouts You LOVE (Keep Doing These!)
These are the workouts that make movement natural for you. They may not be the most ‘efficient’ for fat loss or muscle-building, but they keep you consistent.
✔ Dancing, hiking, swimming, group classes
✔ Anything that makes exercise feel fun
✔ If you love it, it’s keeping you moving—so don’t stop!
2️⃣ Workouts You DON’T LOVE (But Give the Best Results)
These workouts may not be your favorite, but they’re crucial for your goals.
Strength training falls into this category for a lot of women.
You don’t have to love every rep—but you should respect the results it gives.
If you want to lose fat, build muscle, and reshape your body, skipping strength training is NOT an option.
3️⃣ Workouts You HATE (And Don’t Align With Your Goals)
If a workout is both miserable and ineffective, it’s time to let it go.
Hate running and only do it for fat loss? You don’t have to run.
Dread HIIT but feel like you ‘should’ do it? Not necessary.
Avoid lifting because you think it’ll make you bulky? You’re missing out.
Bottom line: You don’t have to love every workout, but you also don’t need to suffer through something that isn’t serving you.
The Real Reason You Might ‘Hate’ a Workout
Before you ditch a workout completely, ask yourself:
❌ Do I hate it because it makes me feel weak or inexperienced?
❌ Am I avoiding it because I don’t understand why it’s necessary?
❌ Am I doing it wrong (bad form, wrong weight, poor pacing)?
Sometimes, it’s not the workout—it’s how we’re approaching it.
Example: The first time you lift heavy, it might feel uncomfortable. But in 3 months? You could feel strong as heck and wonder how you ever lived without it.
If a workout is giving you results, give it 4-6 weeks before deciding it’s not for you. But if it’s miserable AND unnecessary? Ditch it.
How to Make ‘Not-So-Fun’ Workouts More Enjoyable
You may never love every workout, but you can make them more bearable (and even fun!).
✅ Pair it with something you love → Listen to an audiobook, podcast, or hype music.
✅ Make it social → Train with a friend or join a community.
✅ Focus on progress, not just the workout → Seeing yourself get stronger is way more motivating.
✅ Switch up the format → Hate slow strength training? Try circuits, supersets, or functional strength moves.
Sometimes, you don’t need a more fun workout—you just need a smarter way to approach the ones that work.
Final Takeaway: Do You Need to Love Your Workouts?
No, you don’t have to love it.
Yes, you DO need to do what works.
The key is balance:
✔ Do the workouts you love for consistency.
✔ Do the workouts that get results, even if they’re not your favorite.
✔ Let go of the ones that make you miserable AND don’t serve your goals.
Watch the Full Breakdown Here
And if you’re ready for a structured plan that takes the guesswork out of what actually works, check out the EM2WL Training App—it’s designed to help you reset your metabolism, build muscle, and burn fat without wasting time on workouts that don’t work.
Let’s train smart, not suffer!
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