by EM2WL | Apr 28, 2015 | The Journey
A recurring feature on EM2WL is called “The Journey.” We strive to stress the importance of staying consistent, trusting the process, and making EM2WL a lifestyle. In featured “Journey’” stories, we get an inside look at how each person will make the process work for them, as well as demonstrating how this process looks from fresh angles. Journey participants agree to keeping us updated periodically, first sharing their story, then updating as their journey progresses…
My story is not much different than anyone else’s story. I have always battled with my weight. I learned as a teenager, that cutting back on calories and eating a lot less seemed to make the weight just melt off in time for graduation. What a great idea! I fluctuated around the same weight (mid 130’s) all through high school and was very active in sports. The weight slowly crept on and even though I spent much of my university days playing various sports and staying active, it wasn’t until I lifted with an ex-powerlifter that I was introduced to lifting heavy at age 20. We lifted together for about three months. He always came with a plan, and I just did what I was told to do. It worked. I made huge strength gains and worked my way to doing a full pull-up by myself! However, that ended abruptly as I watched the scale continue to go up and up. This resulted in panic and I ended those workouts because I didn’t like seeing the scale increase. Little did I know that I was probably in the best possible place I could be at that time, and that over 20 years later, I’d be back at the weights again!
Throughout the last couple of decades, I have done everything humanly possible to drop the number on the scale. I bought a gym membership and attended group fitness classes because they were fun and I didn’t have to think about what to do in the weight room. I did muscle sculpting classes because I really enjoyed lifting weights, and stepped, stepped, stepped in step aerobics. I ended up becoming certified as an aerobics instructor and taught classes for a number of years. However, throughout all those years, I still wasn’t skinny enough or lean enough and felt like a bit of a fraud teaching classes when I wasn’t as cut as some of the other instructors.
For diets, I’ve tried many… I used Nutri-System for a couple of months, but the program was expensive and although I quickly dropped 8lbs, the food was too horrid and the diet was too strict for me to follow past two months. The weight crept back on plus a bit more. Before I was married, I decided to try Weight Watchers. It worked, I dropped 28 lbs and looked great in my wedding dress, but the meetings were not for me, and weighing in front of others and feeling judged every week, just made me feel awful. I would even try to make sure that I went to the bathroom before weighing in and find lighter and smaller clothes just to make sure I didn’t log a gain on the scale!! That is some insanely disordered thinking which I developed!
After two pregnancies, I decided to try running to get rid of the weight. I made it a goal to try and run my first 5k race and was able to do it without any issues. So, then I set my goal for a 10k race, then a half marathon. I was slower than molasses, but am happy to say that I have completed two half marathons and have the medals to prove it. Was very proud of myself, yet still didn’t have that amazing runner body that I was looking for.
I had resigned myself that I would have to starve in order to look the way I wanted to look. I was eating 1600 calories a day during this time of running and still couldn’t lose a single pound. Little did I know that I was likely forcing my body to hold on to the weight because I wasn’t fueling properly!! I dropped my calories down to 1400 calories, but was really exhausted and my running stalled. I logged a 1.5lb loss and so I thought I had found the magic number to use. I was using a Bodymedia Fit at the time, but didn’t believe that I was burning 2500-2900 calories in a day because if I was, why wasn’t I losing weight??? Maybe I was just an oddball whose body was unable to use the extra calories. I just didn’t have the energy to push myself and it got to the point where running was a chore and no longer enjoyable.
It was at this point of frustration that I found Eat More 2 Weigh Less on MyFitnessPal. I read those pinned notes that Kiki wrote in awe. Really? I didn’t need to starve myself? I had to heal my metabolism and reset? I had a lot of questions and read the threads over and over. I finally worked up enough guts to begin posting and began to understand what was happening in my body. So, I tried bumping up my calories again to 1600, then 1800. I bought New Rules of Lifting and read it cover to cover. I googled Stronglifts and chose to begin that program because I loved the idea of making gains slowly but surely. I gave up my running and decided to focus on lifting. I made some great gains for about 15 months just following Stronglifts, but it became really difficult when I maxed out on my lifts and could no longer make gains. I started to get bored and was not sure what to do next.
At this point, my husband and I went on a trip with our friends to Las Vegas. I was lifting heavy, and still eating around 1800, but had sort of given up on myself. I didn’t know where to turn and how to improve my habits. I knew I didn’t want to eat any less, but the scale wasn’t moving and the lifting wasn’t working for me. On this trip, I hit an all time low. I was at my all time heaviest and just was not able to enjoy the trip because I was so focused on my size. At one point, all of our friends were heading down to the pool and we were supposed to meet them there, but the thought of appearing in public in my bathing suit was horrifying. I had a bit of an emotional breakdown and told my husband that I needed to go and workout because I had to do something to make myself feel better. I went to the gym and lifted hard and heavy. I went back to my room and broke down at the thought of putting on my swimsuit.
I will never forget how awful I felt, so I reached out for help. I will never forget the amazing words of comfort and encouragement that I received from Kiki. She shook me back to reality and so because of her I was able to march down and enjoy the rest of my holiday knowing that we would create a plan for me when I got home so I could focus on some goals and get myself on the road to being a normal human being.
The most embarrassing thing I had to do to begin the process was take pictures of myself. It was humiliating. I did not want to do it, but I knew I had to know where I started to see any progress. So, I sucked it up and sent them away. I then spent the entire year working out and eating more. I learned that I needed to focus on more protein in my diet. Previously, I was lucky to even get 50g in a day. Now, I am taking in at least 150g/day. That was the only change in my eating that I have made other than increasing my calories to about 2200-2400 calories per day. I have been doing weight workouts 3-4 times per week and tried to increase my NEAT every day. I have been faithful to my workouts and have tried pushing my workouts to consistently make gains in strength. I was able to push through my old maximum lifts (Stronglifts) and create new PR’s. But, these changes pale to what has changed mentally for me.
My husband and I just came back from a trip to Mexico with the same friends we traveled with last year. It was amazing. It was the best time we’ve ever had together for me because I was able to get out of my own way. How I felt about myself before actually held me back from doing a lot of things because I didn’t want to be judged. I also was so embarrassed about how I looked that sometimes I pushed my husband away. It was no way to live. Punishing myself was one thing, but punishing the person who cared about me most was another.
Another huge motivation for me were my kids. I did a lot of reading and realized that how I would talk about my body was not the way I wanted my kids to talk about their bodies, especially my daughter. So, slowly, I made a conscious attempt at not beating myself up in the mirror especially in front of her. I began to look for things that did look nice, rather than picking apart my belly, or my rolls, I focused on positives like the little deltoids and triceps that began to peak out. Together we celebrate new muscles that are appearing or how my lifting is going. Often, returning from the gym, the first question I am asked is, “How was your workout, mommy? How much did you lift today?”
Looking back at last year and this year, I’m in a completely different mindset. I know I have worked hard. I have eaten my protein pretty consistently and stopped the anxiety about when I’m going to be skinny. I used to say to myself, “It’s been 4 months, I am not remotely skinny. It’s not working.” But, I’ve learned that my body will do what it wants to do when it wants to do it. I cannot rush the process, but just go along for the ride. I know I am stronger, and I know I have more muscle, but the darn fat is slow to go. Unlike quick weight loss where the changes appear quickly on the scale, but do not last, slow and steady loss will require commitment even when the usual tools to measure progress are not working. I go to do my workouts not to get skinny, but because I know that it will help me get where I want to be. I have bought new clothes because my body has changed and I don’t worry about the size I’m buying because I look better in clothes that fit me. After all, no one sees the size or cares if it is a 10 because if it looks awful, it looks awful!
I have learned to be kind to myself. I know what to do to keep myself from slipping into the negative thoughts. So, on this last vacation, we had fun because I ate the seafood and the desserts, I drank the water, I kept moving and enjoyed myself. I took in the sun, and allowed myself to try some fun things. I tried the pole dancing lessons, water aerobics with the activity crew, and my husband and I went kayaking on the ocean a couple of times. It was wonderful!! I realize finally how lucky I am to be where I am. I thought that I would not be happy until I reached my ultimate goal, but I realize now that I had it all wrong. I have to be happy with where I am so I WILL be able to reach my goals. And, although I’m far from where I want to be, I’m where I need to be.
This year of slugging it out has made me realize that nothing that is worth something comes easy and that quick results are not always lasting results. I want to be able to sustain my changes and knowing that I don’t have to starve myself to do it still amazes me. I weigh exactly the same weight as I did a year ago, which may seem ridiculous to some people. But I haven’t gained any weight and I know I look better because the proof is in the pictures. Most importantly, I have been able to dump an entire lifetime of negative thinking which makes me feel that there is nothing I will not accomplish if I stick to what I know how to do. I have made some changes physically without starving myself and I will continue to make changes because I know I can do it.
This mental shift is priceless and it makes me sad that I was so hard on myself all those years. I am able to admire others who are leaner, smaller or skinnier than myself because they are on their own journeys. I will no longer compare myself to someone else’s journey because we all have our burdens to bear. I know for the first time ever that I can sustain this way of life. For the first time, I’m truly happy, and I just want to thank the EM2WL family for all their support because without it, I would still be hiding and avoiding my own life.
by | Apr 23, 2015 | Increasing calories, Metabolism Reset, Testimonials, The Journey
I’ve always been on a diet. I’m sure that’s not quite the case but I can’t remember NOT thinking about food in terms of “fat vs skinny” and “bad vs good.” When I was probably around 10 my mom and I went on The Beet and Ice Cream Diet. Yes, it’s exactly what it sounds like. For the record, it has
taken about 25 years for me to eat another beet… I also recall that around this time I was actually being paid to lose weight, and I was absolutely thrilled when I got the flu. All this before the age of 12, and that set me up nicely for high school years marked by food anxiety, laxative abuse, binging and purging, cardio sessions that were literally hours long at a time, and most significantly, an extended bout with anorexia in which at the last weigh-in I remember I was 102 on my 5’9’’ frame. (I definitely want to say that eating disorders are never about food per se – there are underlying issues generally centering around feelings of control – but a childhood fraught with food anxieties can create an environment quite conducive to using eating disorders as an outlet for working through those issues.)
Fast forward a bit and I finally had a relatively normal relationship with food. I was a healthy weight (about 135 – 145, I never owned a scale) and ate like a “normal” person: I ate when I was hungry, I ate healthily but indulged when I wanted, and I ran and did yoga when time permitted because it felt good to move. I felt I looked ok but was never happy with the way I looked. And I even made peace with that. I felt with my ED background I was probably never going to have a good sense of what I looked like and regardless, I was probably never going to be happy about it. Uplifting huh? Resigning oneself to a lifetime of meh?
Fast forward a bit more and a more sedentary, office-sitting lifestyle meant I gained a few more pounds. I couldn’t even say what my weight was but I’m going to guess between 155 and 165. I decided to get fit. Bring on the cardio! I began running and doing Insanity, counting calories, the whole deal. I even threw some weight training in there, but I was not lifting heavy enough nor was I eating to support any sort of positive muscle gains. With cardio of 1 hour plus daily (with long runs of 2 hours or so once a week), calories down to between 1500 and 1700 (with a once per week cheat of 1900 – 2000, I’m shaking my head typing this), and carbs shunned like the devil, I got down to 149. For a nanosecond. It was great to see that “14” at the beginning of my scale number. And guess what. I still didn’t like how I looked, I felt like I was moving through mud every day, it didn’t last. The weight just seemed to start piling back on. Restricting or not, running or not, nothing seemed to slow down the weight gain.
At this point I started doing some research and decided that ok, scale weight, who cares. I just want to look good and feel better. I discovered the New Rules of Lifting for Women and began lifting heavy and eating at what I thought would be maintenance. The scale was not kind but I felt like I had no choice; nothing else was working so at least I was putting on some muscle. Around this time I also found EM2WL, and Kiki, Lucia, and Anitra really helped me confirm that I was on the right path and I officially undertook a reset.
The reset was kind of awful, not gonna lie. I felt like a big bag of squishy water. Very sausage-esque, and oh it was summer by the way. I tried to concentrate on the fact that my lifts were going up, I was seeing some muscle pop through on rare occasion J, and that I was getting healthier. I stuck through the reset for the 12 weeks, not counting my NROLFW start, and then moved to the cut phase. My start-of-cut weigh-in in September 2013 was 172, but truthfully I may have gotten higher during reset – I stayed off the scale completely during the 12 weeks because I knew it would be a huge deterrent. The reason I am guessing the scale was higher at some point is because my weight (judged from pictures and clothes) seemed to level out and even drop a little bit towards the end of the reset. This, coupled with the fact that I realized I actually was not looking forward to cutting at all, told me I was ready to cut. Irony is a cruel mistress.
The scale was very slow to start moving on that first cut. Pretty much nothing happened until December after an initial 3 lb water weight drop over 2 
weeks or so. Yes, 3 months of nothing happening! Then by 3/31/14 I was at 162. By 6/30/14, 158 and at 9/30/14, 157.8. The dreaded plateau. I had been taking breaks throughout but knew I was cutting for a long time; I decided to give it a little more of a chance and evaluate. Well, at 11/30/14 I was at 157.2 AND measurements weren’t going down so I said to hell with this. Maintenance break. I ate at maintenance until 1/18/15 and stayed the same weight. I even ate a little above during that time. Then I resumed a cut, taking 2 week long breaks during 2 months and found myself at 150.4. Yes, 7 lbs came off just like that, and that has never ever ever been the case for me.
That was about 3 weeks ago. I evaluate my progress on a monthly basis, so next week we’ll see what the data tells me. I’d like to drop a little bit more fat but you know what? I actually finally kind of like the way I look. I look way better than when I reached that cardio/low cal/low carb 149. Way better. I have muscle now. I’m definitely stronger and happier. Oh, and I can eat. I can maintain at almost 1000 calories more than those old days and while I am pretty active outside of work, I’m not a slave to the treadmill anymore. I lift, I run probably once per week, I spin, I yoga. I do whatever I feel like because it makes me feel good and because now my goals are skill-related (doing a pullup, hitting a bench PR, achieving that yoga pose), not because I have to reach a certain calorie burn.
So that’s my story. Here are some takeaways.
1. Reset sucks but it’s necessary. If you think you can skimp on it you are just setting yourself up for a more drawn out frustration.
2. The cut part is slow. It took a long time to get moving. (And the cut part sucks too, lol. When it does suck that’s when you know you are ready to cut.)
3. When it gets too slow after a while, don’t fight it. Take a break. Your body will win this one so might as well play along. That long break worked for me. I think with a tough plateau, a week or 2 weeks isn’t going to cut it. I’m thinking you need to break for much longer.
4. You must lift weights if you want to change how you look and support a healthier metabolism.
5. Not being focused on the scale but progress in the gym (faster run times, bigger lifts, accomplishing or working on certain bodyweight exercises) also helped me. It’s a mindset shift but once I managed to believe in it, I think the aesthetics are coming more naturally and with less stress.
6. Speaking of the scale, only pay attention to what it has to say IF you are also taking pictures, taking measurements, and using clothes to measure progress. By itself it is a glorified paperweight.
7. Working on controlling stress, or rather my reaction to it, has helped immensely.
8. Did I mention lifting weights? Heavy weights?
Having said that, I’m still a work in process. And I always will be, and not because I’m broken but because I will continue to grow. So far I’ve worked hard to free myself from The Beet and Ice Cream Diet mentality, and it feels good. I don’t have all the answers and many times need to take my own advice. I know me enough to know this will probably continue. I also know me enough to know that I will stumble. I will have setbacks. And I will have victories. I’m going to do my best to keep my head and know that I will sometimes need someone to knock some sense into me. And all of that is ok. Because there are 2 days a year you can’t control – yesterday and tomorrow. That leaves today, and today, I’m just going to do my best and try to have fun doing it.
by | Mar 18, 2015 | Increasing calories, Metabolism Reset, Testimonials, The Journey
As you know this has been quite difficult for me. With the past of the eating disorder trying to take control. I have had many slips but never given up. I had anorexia for 10 years, being emaciated, tube fed, detained. Then bulimia for 15 years (nearly 3 years purge free) I have always had a horrible history with food and eating.
I had known for some time something had to change but I felt I lacked the skills to change this. I felt stuck. I felt powerless. I believed I would have to live the rest of my life diet yo-yoing, a miserable thought. I wanted to change because of my two daughters. I did not want them following my bad habits. I knew what I wanted but how to make it happen?
I spent a decade hating myself, starving myself, purging…my life was a complete mess. I’d go 30 days straight without eating and still exercising, then wondering why I was in hospital being tube fed. I wanted freedom, but I never thought I would be free. I felt like a bird trapped in a cage. My life was the same every day. Get up weigh myself, shower, gym for 2-3 hours. Shower. Go home. School. Home, read ways to burn more calories. Bed. That was my life…then there would be days I’d binge and purge from hunger, enemas, and laxatives. But my life changed for the greater good when I was in hospital detained, being tube fed, not being able to leave bed…I had that light bulb moment. From there on I gained a lot of weight, my body was confused and held onto everything I ate.
What made my recovery harder for me was having 3 miscarriages and having a premature son at 24 weeks who lived 6 days. The guilt. The hate. The anger. The depression. Talk about a major relapse.
Then I discovered EM2WL and this is where my story begins…
I have been sitting here for nearly 30 minutes wondering how to start this entry. I think with last year, trying so hard to lose weight and putting in so much effort and getting very little results has made me think. It’s been something I have been trying to put the pieces together for a little while now.
You’d think with tracking your calories for a year (and honestly) keeping to a 1400 calorie diet and going to the gym nearly every day (burning 400-500 calories) I’d have results. After weeks of trying to find information I came across “Eat More to Weigh Less” I was a little hesitant to go there and look but the other part of me was interested.
I can starve, I can purge, but for the life of me I cannot get this weight off me healthy. I’m trying to learn, but it is hard!
Spending hours reading, and talking to people it has been a real eye opener. The amounts they eat and with half the exercise I’m doing and losing weight…I was/am jealous!!! Reading their stories, they were all so similar to mine, their history. Looking at the photos, amazed me. I had to admit I was very interested…
As they say if what you are doing isn’t working then something has to change. I’m ready for change.
I knew how many calories I was eating. I had a start. I went to many TDEE calculators to see what numbers it would give me. These numbers blew me away, I couldn’t believe it. It took me days for this to sink in and make some sense. My TDEE was just over 2700!!! For weight loss 2200, my jaw dropped.
I had a random thought last night, before the birth of my youngest daughter, Jasmine, I lost weight easily because I was eating more and not killing myself at the gym. Things were starting to click with me. Maybe this was the missing piece of the puzzle I needed.
I spent the past four weeks bringing my calories from 1400 to 1600 calories. I have had to change my exercise because I am draining myself, giving myself no rest or time to recover.
So I have had to make two massive scary changes.
1) Eat more
2) Less HIIT
So, right now I am working on doing HIIT 3 times a week and eating 2200 calories. No less than 2000 calories a day, no excuses.
I can do this, because I want this. This will be my year.
It has been a real challenge, good and bad, but mostly good. I have been doing a metabolism reset for nearly two months. When I first started I was on average 1400-1500 calories. I was always hungry on that, grumpy because I was hungry, the list goes on. Over the past two months I have been adding to my calories. Normally 100 calories every week, sometimes I’d stay there for two weeks. After all there was no rush, I wanted this to be for life, not just for now.
At this current moment I’m at 2000 calories. I’ve had so many challenges and fears to overcome. The two main ones were:
1) I cannot eat that much. Yes I can. It’s been a process, but I can. It’s actually quite easy. A serving of mixed nuts, there is 200 calories. Not crap food but food that will make me grow strong. If I have too many calories left over I’ll have a banana smoothie, or a small bowl of ice cream. I have added food back into my diet that I thought was too high in calories… nuts, seeds, peanut butter, a glass of milk. Oh my how I love nuts!!! Little things but it all adds up. I always feel so hungry lately, it feels completely weird. I have had to learn how to balance out my food over the day, a little planning goes along way.
2) I will gain too much weight. Oh my how this did my head in… If I was eating 1300-1400 calories and not losing and gaining how could this possibly work?! But I knew in my heart, that something had to change…and now. While doing this I have not gained ANY weight. I was scared I would gain so much weight. Yet I haven’t gained ANY weight. This has really played with my head and done amazing things.
Everything I believed about eating X and no more than X calories for so long, has been so wrong. It has been life changing. I have always been jealous of people who could eat so much and gain nothing… This has been the biggest hurdle for me in my recovery. I’d eat ‘normal’ amounts and gain. Then I’d go back to what I knew worked for me, yet in reality it was only screwing me up more. My goal is to get my calories up to my TDEE (2600/2800 calories) then drop it to 2200/2400 calories. From my understanding once I’ve been at these calories for two months and do a cut I should start to lose weight.
This is not easy for me, while doing this I have had to challenge so many of my core beliefs, it is hard but it has been worth it. I just wish I knew about this much earlier. I’m really enjoying this journey, I’m really enjoying the food. I love this, this is an amazing journey…thank you for sharing it with me.
by | Feb 17, 2015 | The Journey
7 months after having my daughter, I was recently separated, back living at home with my mom, and quite honestly feeling horrible about myself. I felt like I had lost my identity in a broken marriage, I had lost my body to my pregnancy, and most of all I had lost my happiness. My daughter deserved more than that. She deserved happiness, she deserved a mother who was proud, confident, healthy, and a good role model. So my journey to a healthier me began…
3 weeks progress
I decided to ask for my mother’s help as she is very involved with Eat More 2 Weigh Less, and also a personal trainer. We have our own little home gym complete with everything one could want for strength training, so it could not be any more convenient! I decided to clean up my eating (cutting out soda and most processed foods) and dedicated myself to workouts and lifting. And dedicate myself, I did. I eat clean, but I also don’t starve myself. I am eating approximately 2,100 calories a day, and concentrating on getting lots of protein in every meal. I love that I don’t feel the need to starve my body for quick results, and I love that I am not “on a diet“. I eat what I want, when I want! (Of course, I do everything in moderation and with more thought to what I am putting into my body).
I have seen so many people go on diets, starving themselves, eating salads, and spending hours running or doing cardio only to eventually quit and go back to their old ways, usually gaining back any weight that they have lost. I did not want this to be me, and I knew I didn’t want to ruin my metabolism. I wanted to create healthy eating and exercise habits that I could maintain for life, not just a diet to fall off of. I wanted to be a good role model for my baby girl. After seeing how successful so many of those following the EM2WL philosophy have been, I decided that a life of starvation was not for me! I wanted to start a program that I knew I could continue for life.
Now I start my mornings with amazing workouts that my mom has set up for me, full of lifting and strength training (with my baby girl looking on, hopefully learning by example…). I am in awe of the progress I have made in only three weeks. I’ve got a long way to go, but I am on my way, for me and my daughter. We deserve it!
by EM2WL | Feb 4, 2015 | Testimonials, Transformations
How long have you been on this journey?
All my life! Ever since I was young I was always aware of my weight, probably due to the media influence. Even as young as four I thought I was fat. I watched my mom struggle on different diets over the years as well. Her journey with food and weight loss had a big impact on me. As a teen, I would try different diets, everything from basically starving myself, to Atkins, to South Beach. In college I tried the low-fat approach. All these diets would work for a period, but none gave me the body I wanted and all left something to be desired. After graduating, I started to pack on pounds at a desk job, and that was what led me to find MFP (MyFitnessPal) and calorie counting. It wasn’t until about a year later that I found the EM2WL group.
When did you first learn that you needed to eat more to reach your goals? What was your original response?
Probably about a year after I started calorie counting. In 2011 I joined MFP, and signed up for the standard 1,200 calories/day diet. I was also training 3-4 times a week for a half-marathon. I would eat back my exercise calories, but I was always hungry, tired and grouchy (ask my roommates!). One day I somehow came across the EM2WL group. All the facts seemed to make sense, but I was scared. In fact, I was really scared. I had managed to lose a couple of pounds eating a 1200 calorie diet, and didn’t want to gain any of it back.
How did others around you act about your decision to discard the usual low cal methods for weight loss?
Most people were supportive. I don’t think anyone likes being on a diet, so most people are open to the idea of eating more if they can do so without expanding their waistline.
How did your body react to the initial increase in cals?
Pretty well. At first I didn’t want to increase too drastically, so I went up to about 1,800 calories a day. I didn’t gain weight, and best of all, I felt SO MUCH BETTER. I wasn’t foggy, had better concentration at work, and felt like I recovered from workouts much faster. On 1,200 a day, I was always hurting and required more sleep, but still didn’t feel fully recovered. I stayed at 1,800 calories for about 2 years until Fall 2014, when a trainer encouraged me to up calories again! I had the same response as before – I was scared because I didn’t want to get fat. But I trusted him, started packing in the protein, and for the first time in my life, I saw real muscle gain!! I started lifting in 2012 around the same time I discovered EM2WL, but never had great strength gains. Sure I got a little stronger and increased my PRs, but I didn’t have much muscle growth. Once I learned to trust the process and eat more, it was like BOOM! There are the muscles!
Did your family notice or comment on any changes once you upped your calories for a period of time?
In the past several months since upping my calories to 2,200-2,400 a day, several co-workers have noticed. One said I look a lot leaner, and another commented, “whatever you’re doing must be working!”
Can you describe your typical workout schedule prior to EM2WL and today?
Prior to EM2WL I was working out about 5 days a week, 3 days running, 2 days doing some kind of resistance or strength training. After EM2WL I switched to 2-3 days of lifting plus 2 cardio workouts a week. I mix up my cardio between HIIT, hiking and boxing.
Has proper fuel affected you in ways other than weight loss? (Good or bad)
Eating more has affected me positively in so many ways. I have more energy and have longer more effective workouts; I am less tired throughout the day and can focus more when I’m at work. Instead of wondering when the next meal is, I just go about my day. I used to always have brittle fingernails, I have noticed they’ve become much stronger with the diet changes.
Would you please describe the mental journey since upping your calories?
This was not easy. I think most diets have as much of a mental component as a physical. I was so scared to eat more because I didn’t want to get fat. The before and after pictures told a story of success, but would it really work for me too? I wondered. It didn’t take long to move past that though because I started feeling better almost instantly. That gave me encouragement to trust the process.
Any parting words of encouragement to those who are new to eating more, or struggling with the decision of whether or not to fuel properly?
Don’t think of it as a diet, think of it as a lifestyle change. Do you want to lost weight only to regain it, and then lose again for the rest of your life? No one wants to do that. We all want to keep it off, and be happy, healthy, and strong. The benefits to eating well are numerous — more energy, improved mood, better sleep, clearer skin, stronger hair and nails, and you even smell better! Stop wasting time with diets. Instead starting learning to fuel yourself and give your body the tools it needs to keep the metabolic fire roaring!
How can the fam hear/see/read more from you?
Be my friend on MFP (kelseyhere) or follow me on Instagram for cool recipes and healthy living tips @hideas_kitchen.
by | Jan 19, 2015 | Testimonials, The Journey
A recurring feature on EM2WL is called “The Journey.” We strive to stress the importance of staying consistent, trusting the process, and making EM2WL a lifestyle. In featured “Journey’” stories, we get an inside look at how each person will make the process work for them, as well as demonstrating how this process looks from fresh angles. Journey participants agree to keeping us updated periodically, first sharing their story, then updating as their journey progresses…
T
he Mental Journey – Renee’s Story
I have just began my journey on EM2WL but I am excited to share this with everyone who is on it, has gone through it, or is struggling. A little bit of background about me: I began my weight loss journey on February 16, 2013. It was one of those days where I woke up and I said to myself, “I don’t want to feel like this anymore!” I can’t explain why this time was so different compared to the other mornings I felt like this, but it was that morning that changed me forever. I joined Weight Watchers and in 2 months I was down 14 pounds.
In April, I made the best decision of my life and spent the money on a personal trainer. He then changed my love for fitness and knowledge about how to work out. I felt on top of the world when I lost 35 more pounds with his training. By March 2014 I was down 50 pounds and feeling on top of the world. I then found MyFitnessPal, quit Weight Watchers (because I was tired of paying for it) and felt that I could continue my journey on my own.
It has been since March that I have maintained my weight loss of 50 pounds. Don’t get me wrong, I am thankful that I am able to keep the weight off for this amount of time, but I still have some unnecessary weight to lose. I was becoming so frustrated with myself because I could not seem to break from the plateau I was in. I was eating between 1200-1400 calories and nothing was happening. In December 2014 I came across EM2WL. I read everything. Every blog. Every success story. The science made sense. I read more articles about eating more in order to lose weight. Everything was making sense why I was on this plateau that I could not break.
There was about a two month period prior to starting EM2WL that I stopped tracking on MFP because I was getting bored and tired of not seeing any results. I couldn’t tell you how much I was eating so instead of doing a full metabolism reset, I opted to do a 15% cut from my TDEE. Even eating at this amount was mind boggling.
One month into EM2WL and I have found the biggest struggle for me: A mental mind game. Every single day. I have been off the scale since my starting date because I know that there will be a weight gain at first. I could not bear to see this on the scale so I chose to go “scale free” until I feel confident that the number means nothing. I read and re-read the EM2WL website, the success stories, and blogs daily for motivation and reassurance that I am going to be just fine. I am an active member on MFP’s EM2WL group. I highly encourage everyone to join it! It is a big help. The people are amazing at helping you understand the process, and give you motivation when you are feeling like you want to quit.
One of the best feelings I have from EM2WL is the energy from eating all this food! I feel great! My workouts feel better, I feel stronger. This is my motivation to continue. Eventually I will get over fear of the scale. Until then, I will stay off for my own sanity. I look forward to updating with great news!
Renee
Instagram: nay_gets_fit_
Remember, EM2WL is a lifestyle, not a quick fix. Featured Journeyers will remind us that we are all a “work-in-progress.” If you are interested in being featured in The Journey, please contact us for more info.
My story is not much different than anyone else’s story. I have always battled with my weight. I learned as a teenager, that cutting back on calories and eating a lot less seemed to make the weight just melt off in time for graduation. What a great idea! I fluctuated around the same weight (mid 130’s) all through high school and was very active in sports. The weight slowly crept on and even though I spent much of my university days playing various sports and staying active, it wasn’t until I lifted with an ex-powerlifter that I was introduced to lifting heavy at age 20. We lifted together for about three months. He always came with a plan, and I just did what I was told to do. It worked. I made huge strength gains and worked my way to doing a full pull-up by myself! However, that ended abruptly as I watched the scale continue to go up and up. This resulted in panic and I ended those workouts because I didn’t like seeing the scale increase. Little did I know that I was probably in the best possible place I could be at that time, and that over 20 years later, I’d be back at the weights again!
For diets, I’ve tried many… I used Nutri-System for a couple of months, but the program was expensive and although I quickly dropped 8lbs, the food was too horrid and the diet was too strict for me to follow past two months. The weight crept back on plus a bit more. Before I was married, I decided to try Weight Watchers. It worked, I dropped 28 lbs and looked great in my wedding dress, but the meetings were not for me, and weighing in front of others and feeling judged every week, just made me feel awful. I would even try to make sure that I went to the bathroom before weighing in and find lighter and smaller clothes just to make sure I didn’t log a gain on the scale!! That is some insanely disordered thinking which I developed!
I had resigned myself that I would have to starve in order to look the way I wanted to look. I was eating 1600 calories a day during this time of running and still couldn’t lose a single pound. Little did I know that I was likely forcing my body to hold on to the weight because I wasn’t fueling properly!! I dropped my calories down to 1400 calories, but was really exhausted and my running stalled. I logged a 1.5lb loss and so I thought I had found the magic number to use. I was using a Bodymedia Fit at the time, but didn’t believe that I was burning 2500-2900 calories in a day because if I was, why wasn’t I losing weight??? Maybe I was just an oddball whose body was unable to use the extra calories. I just didn’t have the energy to push myself and it got to the point where running was a chore and no longer enjoyable. 
At this point, my husband and I went on a trip with our friends to Las Vegas. I was lifting heavy, and still eating around 1800, but had sort of given up on myself. I didn’t know where to turn and how to improve my habits. I knew I didn’t want to eat any less, but the scale wasn’t moving and the lifting wasn’t working for me. On this trip, I hit an all time low. I was at my all time heaviest and just was not able to enjoy the trip because I was so focused on my size. At one point, all of our friends were heading down to the pool and we were supposed to meet them there, but the thought of appearing in public in my bathing suit was horrifying. I had a bit of an emotional breakdown and told my husband that I needed to go and workout because I had to do something to make myself feel better. I went to the gym and lifted hard and heavy. I went back to my room and broke down at the thought of putting on my swimsuit. 
My husband and I just came back from a trip to Mexico with the same friends we traveled with last year. It was amazing. It was the best time we’ve ever had together for me because I was able to get out of my own way. How I felt about myself before actually held me back from doing a lot of things because I didn’t want to be judged. I also was so embarrassed about how I looked that sometimes I pushed my husband away. It was no way to live. Punishing myself was one thing, but punishing the person who cared about me most was another.
Looking back at last year and this year, I’m in a completely different mindset. I know I have worked hard. I have eaten my protein pretty consistently and stopped the anxiety about when I’m going to be skinny. I used to say to myself, “It’s been 4 months, I am not remotely skinny. It’s not working.” But, I’ve learned that my body will do what it wants to do when it wants to do it. I cannot rush the process, but just go along for the ride. I know I am stronger, and I know I have more muscle, but the darn fat is slow to go. Unlike quick weight loss where the changes appear quickly on the scale, but do not last, slow and steady loss will require commitment even when the usual tools to measure progress are not working. I go to do my workouts not to get skinny, but because I know that it will help me get where I want to be. I have bought new clothes because my body has changed and I don’t worry about the size I’m buying because I look better in clothes that fit me. After all, no one sees the size or cares if it is a 10 because if it looks awful, it looks awful!
This year of slugging it out has made me realize that nothing that is worth something comes easy and that quick results are not always lasting results. I want to be able to sustain my changes and knowing that I don’t have to starve myself to do it still amazes me. I weigh exactly the same weight as I did a year ago, which may seem ridiculous to some people. But I haven’t gained any weight and I know I look better because the proof is in the pictures. Most importantly, I have been able to dump an entire lifetime of negative thinking which makes me feel that there is nothing I will not accomplish if I stick to what I know how to do. I have made some changes physically without starving myself and I will continue to make changes because I know I can do it. 
Recent Comments