I guess you could say my story started when I was 15 years old. I was shy, dorky, and pudgy – a bit of a late bloomer, really. One day I looked at myself in the mirror, was disgusted with what I saw, and decided to pretty much stop eating for awhile. I dropped a lot of weight, my confidence skyrocketed, I started going out with my first boyfriend, and I couldn’t believe the joy of being slim. Not eating felt easy with all the stress of high school. Life felt good! After awhile I relaxed a bit, ate a lot of food with my boyfriend, and all the weight came back on fast. Before my graduation I broke up with my boyfriend, was dismayed with the weight gain, stopped eating again for even longer this time, started aerobics and was tiny again by graduation. And there you have it. I have just described the yo-yo pattern that would plague me for the best part of the next decade of my life.
Of course, back then starving myself worked. My metabolism wasn’t damaged, the cardio was new to my body, and I felt amazing. Slowly but surely, the weight started creeping back on (I am definitely not slim by nature), so I would up my cardio, and lower my calories. Over the next few years I felt like I was fighting a losing battle. I did aerobics and step classes morning and night, I didn’t eat much and had insane sugar cravings, so when I did eat it would be to devour an entire pack of lollies in one go. I tried strength training with a personal trainer with terrible results. I had no idea why everyone else seemed to eat so much and stay slim, and I was working around the clock getting nowhere fast. I would lose weight, gain weight, lose weight, gain weight, until a horrible relationship/breakup saw me through the lowest period of self-esteem I think I’ve ever experienced. Looking back on some writing I did at that time, I was in a very dark place. I had never eaten so little in my life. I started experiencing heart palpitations during aerobics, I would feel shaky all day. Things came to a head when I’d been for a huge run in the morning, consumed only one glass of no-fat milk, and fainted during a routine flu shot later that day. When I came to, the nurse told me that my pulse had been very weak, I freaked out and fainted again. I went home and cried and cried and cried. The only way I could stay thin was by starving my body so much that I was slowly killing myself. And I wasn’t even that thin, you couldn’t have even called me skinny. It felt like I was even failing at anorexia. I told myself that living was more important, and that if being pudgy meant living, then pudgy it was. I started eating again, but the relentless cardio didn’t stop. For the next five years I yo-yo’d up and down, the same five kilograms every time, on a small 5’3 girl. I would lose it, people would compliment me. I would relax, put it back on, my clothes would get tight. I would lose it again. I tried the cabbage soup diet, low carb, meal replacement shakes – you name it, I tried it. I would drop weight so quickly (fluid, obviously), stick with whatever it was for a couple of weeks, give up and binge, find another diet to try. I was totally, ridiculously stuck. Some nights I would just cry. My weight felt like the hardest battle in the world. And at the same time I hated myself for putting so much emphasis on the way I looked.
Fast forward a couple of years to meeting the love of my life. Someone who loved me and my body so wholesomely and transparently that I finally began to believe there was more to me than what I weighed. I still yo-yo’d, he still loved my body at every turn. I was coming out of my early twenties and seeing the world a lot differently. I was so burnt out after 8 years of relentless, punishing cardio, I needed a break. I took a year off exercise. For a whole year, I watched my hard bits go soft, and my soft bits get softer. But somehow I knew that if I didn’t do this, nothing would ever change. He still loved me. When I stopped fitting into my biggest clothes, I knew I was ready to go back. I started exercising again slowly. My relationship with food was still pretty crappy, but I felt better. I was still the queen of fads, however. I got obsessed with hot yoga, then obsessed with running, then obsessed again with aerobics. I found out I was going to be on TV and I knew I “had to get serious” again with my food. I went online to research rapid fat loss, spoke to people in the fitness industry who I thought could give me expert advice. I was back on super-low carb and super-low cal, but I knew I needed a way to track what I was doing. I found the myfitnesspal app, set it to the magical 1200 and knuckled-down. I was so proud of myself, I was being so strict. I would brag to my boyfriend about how healthy I was eating, but go to bed starving. Some days I was netting 700. Who cares what MFP said about this being too low, a huge calorie deficit was a huge win, right?! Wrong, obviously. Yes, I lost, but barely, enough so that I felt ok on TV, but not enough. I was had pudgy areas, the fat just wasn’t going anywhere. Something was very, very wrong and again, I just didn’t understand why it was just so damn hard for me.
I started reading the forums to get some answers and very quickly came across the EM2WL group. I read, and read and read. Read the starvation studies, read about my BMR, read about how I had been doing serious damage to my poor metabolism for the best part of a decade. Everything suddenly made perfect sense. Yes, I was terrified to increase my calories, but I knew I was ready for the lifelong change. I went straight to 1800 and in those first few days, the pure joy of eating full meals was enough to bring tears to my eyes. I couldn’t believe I could eat this much, and that it was still a calorie deficit. I realised the importance of strength training. I re-joined the gym and ordered the New Rules of Lifting for Women. I started straight away. From that very day, I knew that I had made a lifestyle change. I repeated over, and over to myself (and still do to this day): “Have patience. This is going to take time. Imagine what you’re going to look like in 3 years”. I still look in the mirror today, see the small changes that come with a small calorie deficit, and remind myself of the same things. Every day he touches my back or my leg, in disbelief of how strong and firm my body is feeling, yet I know he would love me know matter what. And I know I will too. I have come to realise, very sadly, that I abused my body relentlessly for 10 years, I am still learning to forgive myself. But I love myself far too much these days to ever go back. I’m not perfect, some days I get impatient and contemplate a bigger deficit for a quicker change, but I know it’s not worth it in the long run. Why compromise my metabolism for a short-term gain? I always want to be able to eat this much. There is no point compromise my strength training now that my muscles are flourishing.
Another huge thing that has happened to me is the focus on my macros. I used to hear people talking about “fueling” their workouts, and eating to suit their training, but I never understood how they could do it, to me that sounded like “eat cardboard and run”. Previously I’d had such a flawed relationship with food that when I was actually eating, it would be sweet, fatty and the highest of carb for instant gratification. If I wasn’t eating all day, when I did eat, it was going to be good. But I learnt through EM2WL that that if I wanted muscles, I needed protein so I started looking for ways to increase it. Some of the best advice I ever received from Kiki & Lucia was to shoot for my protein macro every day, and the rest should fall into place. This was so true!! I’m now successfully eating at a ratio of 35% protein, 30% carb, 35% fat. I never, ever thought I could be one of “these people” and still enjoy my food. Also since the day I increased my calories, I have never felt deprived again. I don’t think I’ve had a single binge since.
Some days I get a bit emotional thinking of where I’ve been, and where I am now, and just want to fly over the other side of the world to give Kiki & Lucia the biggest hug that I can possibly give. These women, through their patience, goodness and selfless enthusiasm, have undoubtedly turned my destructive relationship with food and my body into a passion for health and fitness that I’ve never experienced. They have taught me patience and given me the tools to continue eating well and getting stronger and fitter for the rest of my life. All I want to do now is help spread the word to women especially, that we don’t have to starve ourselves to lose weight. I have become so passionate about the cause. And I can finally say that my body is looking healthier and firmer than I’ve ever seen it. Imagine what it will look like in 3 years!
Have an EM2WL transformation to share? Willing to let us tag along on your journey? We’d love to see it! Be featured on our Transformation/Journey page by submitting your story to Success@EM2WL.com
So, now that many of you have taken a look at the new Starter Kit e-book we’d love to know your opinion.
In addition, we would love to help someone get a start on the fitness side of their journey. We created the book for you, the fam, so we want to make sure that it is meeting your needs. Drop us a line in the comments section, and we will be picking a random winner next week for a free workout DVD set.
The Prize: Supreme 90-Day DVD workout series
As you’ve probably read by now, EM2WL is all about strength training being incorporated in your fitness journey, for best results. Although we recognize that not everyone will choose to strength train, we highly recommend it. So, we’d like to help one new member of the fam – who may be hesitant due to lack of knowledge, funds, or equipment – to get started with strength training. We will be giving away a 10 discDVD program that uses minimal equipment. Dumbbells and the stability ball are all you need to get started in this program, so if you already have those, then you’ll be ready to go. This is also a 90 day (12 week), program so it will take you right through your metabolism reset or first 12 weeks of your cut. This would be a good way to get in the habit of strength training if you’re not already or to help you break plateaus by incorporating a new routine if you already are. You can read more about the program here.
How to enter:
Just drop us a line in the comments section below.
Let us know what you what you think, and how we can help. So many people were saying that they were confused/overwhelmed by having to read links and posts all over the place. The purpose of the Starter Kit was to hopefully alleviate the confusion of “Where do I start?” “What do I do next?”
We just want to make the journey as simple as possible, so that you have everything that you need to get started on your journey. Now.
So what did you think? How did we do? Are there still questions unanswered? More info that you’d like to see? Was the information presented in a way that made it any more useful than trying to piece things together? Have you already started on your journey? How are you feeling? More/less energy? Are you experiencing any of the phases that the book discusses? Have you started figuring out ways to make it work for YOU? Concerns or complaints? Let us know how we can improve!
In the meantime, check out the video clip of the DVD set that you’ll be eligible of receiving just for letting us know your thoughts.
Contest Ends:
Random winner will be chosen Nov. 1, 2012 at 11:59pm, and announced on Nov. 2, 2012.
I just did for about 5 min, and my self-esteem literally took a hit.
Ugh! I couldn’t believe the affect that it had on me. I try to kid myself that I’m “past” all that, but the feelings that surfaced took me back. One of the things that I learned too late in my journey was not to wear clothes that made me feel horrible about myself. Don’t make the same mistake that I did. Find clothes that fit you now –the way that you look right now – and make you feel good about yourself. When you wear clothes that make you feel frumpy, then you’re going to feel even more discouraged in your journey. As I begrudgingly “suffered” through my (seemingly never-ending) journey, several (unpleasant) things about myself rose to the surface. One was my obvious lack of contentment in most ANY situation (I’d gone from eating barely 1200-1400 cals to well over 2000 and still complained – really? LOL). I also realized that the clothing I was wearing contributed greatly to my dissatisfaction with how I looked. I was either wearing clothes that were too big for me because I wanted to be “comfortable”, or I was pining for clothes that were too small for me (and feeling sorry for myself). So, whenever I tried them on I would feel fat.
When it comes to your clothing, fit is everything.
Not just you being physically fit, but the actual fit of your clothes. If they do not fit YOU, you will look and feel miserable. Period. Regardless of your size. Many articles will tell you to have a certain piece of clothing that you keep trying on, or to buy something smaller than the size that you need to have as motivation to get to that size. That can be a good tool, but you have to know yourself – and be realistic. Decide if it’s something that will motivate or de-motivate you. Realize, also, that even though you have these “goal” clothing items it may still take you a while before you get there. What will you do in the meantime? A few ideas:
Limit your goal items – or at the very least the ones that are within reach. Have one or two items that you want to wear when you’re at goal, put the rest away or give them to Goodwill/sell on Ebay. Be honest with yourself about the items. Will they still be fashionable when you get to goal? Are they even fashionable now? How do they make you feel about yourself now? How will they make you feel when you can fit them? Do they work for the new shape your body is taking on? If they do not complement your body shape, then it doesn’t matter. You shouldn’t keep them around. Make sure the items fit you, not just you fitting into them. There is a difference.
Have multiple goals. Buy maybe one item that is the next size down and another the next size down until you get to goal so that you have something that you’re striving for all along the way instead of being a size 20 and only having a size 4 pants as your goal pants. That would only discourage you because there are SO many sizes between 20 and 4.
Shop for clothing that fits you right now. Another suggestion is to not have “goal” clothes at all. Pre-purchasing something with the assumption that it will fit at some point in time can backfire. Your body is changing in shape, and that new shape will likely end up better than you could imagine (higher boobs/butt, shaplier legs, etc). So pre-purchasing something that may make you despise your new changes – a shirt that is too tight in the chest area, or jeans with too low of a rise – could prove a waste of time, money, and sanity. Instead, try purchasing as you go. Set mini goals (ex: “every week/month that I consistently hit my protein goal, I will buy a new outfit that flatters me NOW.”). There are so many books, magazines, YouTube vids, TV shows that give advice on how to shop for the full figure/no figure/large bust/no bust/bigger hips, belly, etc., that should leave us with no excuse. Dress in a way that does not make you uncomfortable, or cling to the places that you want to disguise — yet still flatters you, and makes you feel good about yourself every step of the way.
This does not have to be a costly thing. This is not mean that you need to go and buy new wardrobe for every size. If you do a bit of research and discover what the “tricks of the trade/rules” for your body-type, you can apply these to whatever your budget is. You can find items at Goodwill to GAP to Neiman Marcus, and everywhere in between. Whatever clothing shops you frequent, the key is to look for clothes that flatter you. right. now. You could even use the money that you sell the old items for to buy new ones each time. This does not have to be a full-blown shopping spree since you’re not at goal size. You do not have to become a “fashionista,” read every issue of Vogue, or follow every fashion trend that comes your way. But, the value of simply having clothes that fit, complement YOU, and make you feel good about yourself versus wearing items that don’t fit (big OR small) can not be understated. If you wear clothes that make you feel that you’re accomplishing nothing, you will begin to believe it. You are caring for your body in a new and better way, and the clothing that you wear should exemplify that.
It seems so simple, so trivial, but I dare you to give it a shot.
Have you, like me, uncovered any skeletons in your closet along this journey? Are you waiting until you get to a certain goal before purchasing new items? Do you feel as if you are “giving up” or conceding defeat by purchasing clothing items other than your final goal size? What is your game plan for the in-between sizes? Have you discovered any tips along the way to make you feel good about yourself at every level of the journey? A new haircut every 5lbs? Pedicure when you lose a certain amount? New pants every few inches lost? How are you making the journey work for you, your lifestyle, and your budget?
I started EM2WL in March. I jumped right into it cause for one, I loved the name of the group. Eat more, why not? Weigh less. Oh yeah! The first two months I was trying to get the hang of everything going from the crazy 1200 cal diet my doc gave me to my BMR. I loved it, but I was gaining weight back. I knew why – cause for 6 months I ate 1200 cals, worst mistake of my life. I should have went to a nutritionist instead of my fam doc. I’m just so blessed that I found this group, it changed my life.
I did get upset when I gained those pounds I worked so hard to get off, but this is worth sticking to. It’s been 7 months since starting EM2WL and I love it. I can’t believe I survived off 1200 cals. I’m never going back there again! As of now I’m 157.4, the lowest I been since I started my journey last year in September. I was 202lbs. Now I have 7.4 lbs til my goal weight and my cal intake just keeps increasing! (I eat over 2000 cals a day!) Yes, I love that! Also, I use to burn over 1000 cals a day tryna lose weight, but I realize I only can burn no more than 600 cals a day and still lose weight — which is not a problem at all 60 mins a day of exercising and I’m done. I’m a wife and mother of two children. When I was eating at 1200 calories, plus doing high burns, I didn’t have that much energy to keep up with my family. I was tired most of the time. Now that I eat more – and most of the time have low calorie burns – I have so much energy because I realized I need to have more fuel (food) in order for my body to function properly.
I weigh in every month and every month I’m pleased to say I lose something, which I’m happy with. Anything lost is a greatly appreciated loss. Slow and steady wins the race. I used to give myself time limits like, “I’m going to lose this much by this time”- not no more cause I realize my body gonna work how it works! We go through so many changes that there is no need to set a limit when this is a lifetime journey!
OK I’m gonna stop rambling, but I can go on! I really just wanna say Thanks to Lucia and Kiki! You both are life changers! Cheers to eat more 2 weigh less!
Have an EM2WL transformation to share? Willing to let us tag along on your journey? We’d love to see it! Be featured on our Transformation/Journey page by submitting your story to Success@EM2WL.com
Adopting one new habit at a time results in an 85% chance of success
Adopting two new habits at once: a 35% chance of success
Adopting three or more new habits at once: less than 10% chance of success
WOW! According to those stats, most of us put ourselves at a 3-5% chance of success! (or less!)
But remember, it’s not just the “choosing” of a new goal/habit that makes you successful. You must also make sure that the habit is realistic. Simply saying, “I want to run a marathon” or “I’m going to add more cardio” is much too broad (even if it is the ultimate goal). The couch to 5k programs are a great example of this, as they take a “big” goal, and break it into manageable pieces (aka habits), until the “true” goal is accomplished somewhat effortlessly. So a manageable habit would be along the lines of “I’m going to begin a C25K program”, or “I will add 30 minutes of cardio twice per week”, etc..
To declare, “I’m going to clean up my eating this month!” is not sufficient either. Break down the specifics of what “cleaning up your eating” means to you. This will be different for everyone. Let’s take a walk through this process to see how it could look:
Suppose that cleaning up my diet means that I want to: lower my sugar intake, increase my protein, eat more fiber, and drink more water. I would then look at this list of items and decide which one would have the greatest impact. Let’s say that I know that my protein is WAY too low for my muscle building/maintenance goals, so I decide to increase protein as my first fitness goal. I would take this one step further and decide how to increase protein. I would think of how and what types of proteins I like to eat, and then break it down a smaller goals. If I love organic beef jerky, I may decide that I will add an extra pack of jerky to my meal plan three times per week for the next month. This is in addition to what I already eat. So this would mean that I am adding protein to my diet. Or, I may decide to add a protein shake to my day, on top of my usual eating. This adds protein to my diet without changing any other factors. Once this has been done consistently I can then tackle more proteins if I’m still not at the level that I want to be at. Or, move to the next goal (i.e. fiber). But trying to attack all three macronutrients at the same time typically doesn’t pan out well.
The same goes for a goal to “lower sugar intake” (again, too broad). Instead of attempting to cut all sugar out of the diet all at once(not realistic), break it down into smaller attainable goals. An example would be to remove one soda (or Salted Caramel Frappuccino, Kiki) from each day, if prone to drinking multiple sodas per day. Simply cutting a daily soda out of the diet reduces sugar intake, which in turn lowers carb intake. Lowering your carb intake will naturally increase protein to carbohydrate ratio.
See where this is going? One change, sparking multiple results.
Are we saying that you should cut all sodas and Fraps from your diet and run a 5k? Ummm, no (and I’m sure we all know, that Kiki will do neither). We’re looking for major impact items here, remember? If you only drink soda a few times per month, or despise running, those may not be your “wow factor” items. Only you know what you need to work on, what is unnecessary “excess,” or what you are willing (or NOT willing, as in Kiki’s love of sweets/hatred for cardio) to let go of. Make room for things that you love, in moderation, change (add OR subtract) what you feel you can/should change (without being unrealistic with yourself – don’t force yourself to eat quinoa, for instance, if you can’t stand it).
Yes, these seem like simple things that we all know and have heard since the beginning of our journey, but yet sometimes the simplest things are the ones that we neglect. We want to “multitask” EVERYTHING, including our weight loss. In the long run this accomplishes nothing other than putting us on the fast track to nowhere – with habits that cannot be maintained. Although it seems that progress will be snails’ pace when it is one thing at a time, these things add up over the course of one, two, or ten years, leading to a changed LIFE.
I guess you could say my story started when I was 15 years old. I was shy, dorky, and pudgy – a bit of a late bloomer, really. One day I looked at myself in the mirror, was disgusted with what I saw, and decided to pretty much stop eating for awhile. I dropped a lot of weight, my confidence skyrocketed, I started going out with my first boyfriend, and I couldn’t believe the joy of being slim. Not eating felt easy with all the stress of high school. Life felt good! After awhile I relaxed a bit, ate a lot of food with my boyfriend, and all the weight came back on fast. Before my graduation I broke up with my boyfriend, was dismayed with the weight gain, stopped eating again for even longer this time, started aerobics and was tiny again by graduation. And there you have it. I have just described the yo-yo pattern that would plague me for the best part of the next decade of my life.
I would lose weight, gain weight, lose weight, gain weight, until a horrible relationship/breakup saw me through the lowest period of self-esteem I think I’ve ever experienced. Looking back on some writing I did at that time, I was in a very dark place. I had never eaten so little in my life. I started experiencing heart palpitations during aerobics, I would feel shaky all day. Things came to a head when I’d been for a huge run in the morning, consumed only one glass of no-fat milk, and fainted during a routine flu shot later that day. When I came to, the nurse told me that my pulse had been very weak, I freaked out and fainted again. I went home and cried and cried and cried. The only way I could stay thin was by starving my body so much that I was slowly killing myself. And I wasn’t even that thin, you couldn’t have even called me skinny. It felt like I was even failing at anorexia. I told myself that living was more important, and that if being pudgy meant living, then pudgy it was. I started eating again, but the relentless cardio didn’t stop. For the next five years I yo-yo’d up and down, the same five kilograms every time, on a small 5’3 girl. I would lose it, people would compliment me. I would relax, put it back on, my clothes would get tight. I would lose it again. I tried the cabbage soup diet, low carb, meal replacement shakes – you name it, I tried it. I would drop weight so quickly (fluid, obviously), stick with whatever it was for a couple of weeks, give up and binge, find another diet to try. I was totally, ridiculously stuck. Some nights I would just cry. My weight felt like the hardest battle in the world. And at the same time I hated myself for putting so much emphasis on the way I looked.
Fast forward a couple of years to meeting the love of my life. Someone who loved me and my body so wholesomely and transparently that I finally began to believe there was more to me than what I weighed. I still yo-yo’d, he still loved my body at every turn. I was coming out of my early twenties and seeing the world a lot differently. I was so burnt out after 8 years of relentless, punishing cardio, I needed a break. I took a year off exercise. For a whole year, I watched my hard bits go soft, and my soft bits get softer. But somehow I knew that if I didn’t do this, nothing would ever change. He still loved me. When I stopped fitting into my biggest clothes, I knew I was ready to go back. I started exercising again slowly. My relationship with food was still pretty crappy, but I felt better. I was still the queen of fads, however. I got obsessed with hot yoga, then obsessed with running, then obsessed again with aerobics. I found out I was going to be on TV and I knew I “had to get serious” again with my food. I went online to research rapid fat loss, spoke to people in the fitness industry who I thought could give me expert advice. I was back on super-low carb and super-low cal, but I knew I needed a way to track what I was doing. I found the myfitnesspal app, set it to the magical 1200 and knuckled-down. I was so proud of myself, I was being so strict. I would brag to my boyfriend about how healthy I was eating, but go to bed starving. Some days I was netting 700. Who cares what MFP said about this being too low, a huge calorie deficit was a huge win, right?! Wrong, obviously. Yes, I lost, but barely, enough so that I felt ok on TV, but not enough. I was had pudgy areas, the fat just wasn’t going anywhere. Something was very, very wrong and again, I just didn’t understand why it was just so damn hard for me.
I started reading the forums to get some answers and very quickly came across the EM2WL group. I read, and read and read. Read the starvation studies, read about my BMR, read about how I had been doing serious damage to my poor metabolism for the best part of a decade. Everything suddenly made perfect sense. Yes, I was terrified to increase my calories, but I knew I was ready for the lifelong change. I went straight to 1800 and in those first few days, the pure joy of eating full meals was enough to bring tears to my eyes. I couldn’t believe I could eat this much, and that it was still a calorie deficit. I realised the importance of strength training. I re-joined the gym and ordered the New Rules of Lifting for Women. I started straight away. From that very day, I knew that I had made a lifestyle change. I repeated over, and over to myself (and still do to this day): “Have patience. This is going to take time. Imagine what you’re going to look like in 3 years”. I still look in the mirror today, see the small changes that come with a small calorie deficit, and remind myself of the same things. Every day he touches my back or my leg, in disbelief of how strong and firm my body is feeling, yet I know he would love me know matter what. And I know I will too. I have come to realise, very sadly, that I abused my body relentlessly for 10 years, I am still learning to forgive myself. But I love myself far too much these days to ever go back. I’m not perfect, some days I get impatient and contemplate a bigger deficit for a quicker change, but I know it’s not worth it in the long run. Why compromise my metabolism for a short-term gain? I always want to be able to eat this much. There is no point compromise my strength training now that my muscles are flourishing.
Some of the best advice I ever received from Kiki & Lucia was to shoot for my protein macro every day, and the rest should fall into place. This was so true!! I’m now successfully eating at a ratio of 35% protein, 30% carb, 35% fat. I never, ever thought I could be one of “these people” and still enjoy my food. Also since the day I increased my calories, I have never felt deprived again. I don’t think I’ve had a single binge since.
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