Growing up I was a tomboy. I loved climbing trees, riding on snowmobiles and ice skating in Massachusetts where I was born. We moved to Tennessee when I was 10 and from then on I played softball, swam, rode bikes, took classes of some sort in the summers (dance, gymnastics, ballet). I stayed active and never thought about my weight. I remember my mother drinking Tab and keeping sugar out of the house, because she was always dieting and she encouraged my sister and I to watch our sugar intake so we didn’t get fat.
Beginning the Diet Mentality Cycle
Once I hit age 14, I was in constant competition with my best friend, trying to be the same size she was. We went on diets constantly trying to get the perfect model-size body. This was in the era of Cheryl Tiggs and Charlie’s Angels. I remember even going on ice cube diets. I was a size 7 but all I saw in the mirror was thick thighs and thick waist. I remember a friend in high school that would wear a bandana as a belt, and I envied her for that. Of course I never took into account the fact that she had a long and lean build, whereas I have a short (5’3″) athletic build. From that time on, I was always dieting.
In my 20s I started lifting light weights and doing The Firm videos after they came out. I loved what squats and pushups did for my build. My body puts on muscle fairly easily. In my later 20s I got burned out with the routine I was doing and I started running instead. I wasn’t very good at it due to asthma, but I absolutely loved pushing myself to the point where it hurt to breathe in. I did 5Ks and for awhile every Thanksgiving morning my sister and I would meet in our hometown for the Autumnfest 8K. It was crazy, usually in the 30s and one time it was in the 20s.
Finding my passion
When I turned 37 I discovered the local recreation department offered tae kwon do classes. I signed up and never looked back. It was the best of both worlds, building muscle and pushing yourself until you’re gasping for air and think you’ll pass out. I LOVED IT! 3 nights a week for 2 hours I was giving it all I had, even sparring with the men. I worked out for another hour 3 other nights in my garage with a punching bag. And I was good at it!
5 years 2 broken bones and torn ligament in my finger later, I tested for my black belt. I was in the best shape of my life. I had washboard abs, shoulder muscles that popped out and strong legs. But all this time training had really hurt my home life. I had really neglected my husband and I felt guilty. Stress took hold and I lost my appetite. For 3 months I ate very little, and my muscles were the first to exit. Needless to say, the weight started climbing at that point.
I stayed with martial arts for another 2 years but I had torn ligaments in my hip from overuse and my back always hurt. I finally realized it was not worth the pain. I took up a new hobby, watching television and spending time with my husband. I tried Weight Watchers and a couple online diet companies. None were possible for me to stick with. I was used to being able to eat anything I wanted, these diets left me starving. I tried Atkins but couldn’t live without carbs. I lost some weight with Thrive which was a plan created by a local man. He now calls it Shiboleth. It was doable but for me impossible to stick with. It limits carbs and fats too much for me and left me without energy and feeling weaker than ever.
Taking back my life
In 2012 I signed up with My Fitness Pal where I came across a group called Eat More to Weigh Less. I read all about it and found it to be very sensible. But I couldn’t stomach a reset. I mean I just wouldn’t do that. So I just watched my calories through MFP, trying to stay with 1200. I failed most days but even when I stayed on it, I couldn’t seem to lose weight. I think it’s because I had lost so much muscle, but losing my mother and menopause were major reasons also.
In 2017 I faced the fact that I needed to quit dieting and learn to accept myself the way I am. I got back into the gym a couple nights a week and did whatever I wanted. Walked, punched a bag, pushups, it didn’t matter as long as I did something. I knew exercise would help my mood and attitude more than anything else would. I also started looking at the EM2WL website and Facebook group, where I came across the announcement for the workshop in the Fall. I signed up thinking it would just be instructions for how to get started with a reset and how to move through the phases. Boy was I wrong! (But for the better!) It was about the mental game and learning to love yourself as you are now. I really needed that. It was also about creating a path that will work for you, which is exactly what I needed.
Breaking free from Diet Mentality
I am now in my first cut phase. It hasn’t been easy because we’re just coming off the holidays and I’ve probably been in the maintenance phase as much as I’ve been in the cut phase, but I know now how to analyze what I’ve done and I know I can change the rules to make them work for me. I’m also using the EM2WL Workout app to work out and I absolutely love it! It’s the guidance I need. I’m definitely increasing my strength. My clothes are starting to loosen up slightly around the waist. I haven’t weighed myself and I don’t know that I will. If I’m building muscle, which I’m sure I am, then the weight won’t go down. But I will measure in a month or so and I do think I’ll like what I see!
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Increasing calories is an important aspect of building muscle. As we discussed in a previous blog post, you cannot build muscle and lose fat at the same time. So there should be a point in your year where the focus is on building muscle, and winter is usually a great time to do just that.
Increasing Calories in the Winter
There are two major reasons for increasing calories in the winter – maintenance eating and building muscle. For most people, there is a natural tendency to “fall off” dieting in the Fall and Winter. Because the urge to increasing calories is normal during these colder months, it makes sense to utilize this for muscle building. By doing so, this sets the stage for success in the Spring/Summer when fat loss is desired. In addition to heeding natural tendencies, taking an extended diet break during this period gives your metabolism a chance to heal/re-boot from cut phases.
(Remember: Over time your metabolism adjusts to whatever calorie level you’re eating consistently. So if you are in a cut for too long, that caloric level becomes your new maintenance.)
A winter reset (eating at maintenance) actually helps your metabolism to heal, giving your body a good amount of time to “remember” where TDEE is before another cut is attempted. During this time, many in the fam will choose to eat in surplus of their TDEE (Bulk). Bulking gives your body extra calories, which helps to build more muscle. Whether you eat at maintenance or bulk during the winter, either will help achieve greater fat loss in the spring. Too many dieters think that restricting calories for many many months will help get to goal faster. The truth is, without taking those breaks – you often feel as if you look worse because of the muscle loss from non-stop dieting. Just remember, you can’t show off muscle in the summer, if you haven’t built the muscle under the fat in the winter (or at some point throughout the year!).
It’s no secret that muscle building phases can cause some gains on the scale and “puffiness” on the body (as muscle builds underneath the fat layers, pushing it outward). In many parts of the world, winter tends to be the time where layers of clothing are worn. Those heavier sweaters, hoodies, sweatpants, blanket scarves, etc provide the perfect opportunity to stylishly “hide” areas you’d rather not flaunt, while you get down to business (building muscle). By fully embracing this as a time of year for muscle building, you can fully enjoy your fat loss phase in the spring and summer (with the benefit of increased metabolism!).
Be sure to take advantage of the colder months to rest, recharge and take a break from a reduction in calories. But do so with purpose (not simply “I’ll start over in Spring!”). Tracking calories and paying attention to your macros are still very important during this time. Be sure to enjoy yourself, but remember that maintaining now allows for a successful cut later.
This question we get asked the most by fam in our Online Community – “When can I switch phases?” It’s a question most members don’t want to hear the actual answer to. So before we dive into this post, consider what phase you are currently in, and whether you think you should be moving on to the next phase. This is especially important if you just recently switched into your current phase or think you can springboard from one phase to the next.
When you think it’s time – it’s not
In any given phase, the need to move on to the next one as fast as possible is reminiscent of our diet mentality ways. Jumping full speed ahead without any consideration of whether the steps needed right now are even mastered is usually the downfall for many. If you are constantly saying “I’m ready, what’s next?” it’s guaranteed you have not mastered your current phase. If you are content in your phase, happy to not move on and just stay where you are, then generally it’s time to move on.
When you decide to sit in a certain phase, you need to give 100% to the processes in that phase. That means if you are in a Reset phase, you are consistent. Calories are always being hit, macros are spot on, workouts are consistent and challenging. If you want to move to a Cut, but haven’t mastered these, then Cut will not go the way you want it to. Then this adds more time to your journey by trying a Reset again. This applies to all phases – even a Chill!
By asking “what else?” during your phase, you aren’t truly understanding and taking into consideration what change is needed. Think of each phase as a chapter in a math text; if you can’t understand the principles in chapter 1, you are certainly going to fail by chapter 10. Spend the time and truly dig deep and understand what each phase requires of you and master each and every step needed.
Vegan protein almost sounds like an oxymoron. Protein mainly comes from animals or dairy, two of the largest eliminations from a vegan diet. So it almost seems impossible to get the suggested 30% of protein in a day in order to maximize fat loss. Many EM2WL vegans may think that this exempts them from the protein recommendations, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Vegan protein vs. vegetarian protein
It’s no secret that vegans and vegetarians can have a harder time hitting their protein macro. But it is not impossible, nor should it be excusable. Vegetarians have a slightly easier job because they can still eat dairy and eggs. Vegans however have to get a bit more creative when it comes to protein.
Nuts, seeds tofu and legumes often become the main focus for a vegan lifestyle. These items can certainly help fill in some of the vegan protein gap, but they also tend to have higher levels of fat and carbs attached to them. This means that the ratio can be harder to balance out for those striving to hit physique-specific goals.
For example, beans have a high level of protein, but the carb level also increases by 4x. This could mean that the beans carry 10g of protein, but the carbs could be 50 or 60g. This makes it very hard to hit macros such as 40/30/30. Vegans would need to pay closer attention to their vegan protein source, and it’s carb/protein/fat ratios to ensure that balance and still maximize their ability to lose fat.
Awareness is key. Simply knowing to pay attention in these areas will begin to open your eyes to items that may have been right under your nose all along. For example: many EM2WL vegans have found ways to increase their protein intake with simple swaps of plant based bread products. These give a much higher level of protein than regular bread. These can be a little hard to find locally, but if you are an international shopper you could try ordering from Here.
When it comes to balancing your macros, the only thing to keep in mind is that, for fat loss, protein should still hit that 30-35% mark. Vegans actually need to eat slightly more than a carnivore when it comes to getting in protein, simply because of the kinds of proteins they eat. They don’t process the same as meat and dairy do.
Allow carbs and fat to fall where they may, based on personal preference, so long as the protein hovers above that 30% mark. For a vegan this may take some time, (ok a LOT of time) to work your way up to that percentage, but the higher that level can get, the better off a muscle-keeping, fat-loss-seeking vegan will be.
When dieters first discover Eat More 2 Weigh Less, it’s usually after years of caloric restriction that has hindered fat loss efforts. It can take a little bit of research and trust, but eventually reality sets in that perpetually eating less is NOT the answer. They buckle in, and after a full metabolism reset, re-enter the fat loss ring with renewed mental and physical strength. This is not an overnight breakthrough, however. Fat loss with EM2WL often occurs in at least five stages, or “a-ha moments,” being uncovered as the journey progresses. Some will go through the stages randomly, while most tend to handle them in order that follows. In the end, if does not matter which order they are taken in, but rather that they are all learned.
Eating more
The first stage for fat loss is almost always finding out you need to eat more. Generally anyone coming from a 1200 calories diet plan, or 21 day fixes or anything that restricts the amount of energy you take in, will quickly realize that you were duped into thinking “Eat Less, Move More.” It is simply not true.
Our bodies are like an engine and they require energy in order to function correctly. Without the right amount of energy, the engine begins to wear down. So when we starve on 1200 calorie diets, it is not getting enough fuel to function properly and fat loss is hindered.
The realization that more food = more energy comes quick to most. For others, its a longer process to accept that yes, we need more food. When the connection has been made, almost immediately the outward signs of under eating start to dissipate. Nails start to grow, hair stops falling out, sleep is better quality, moods change for the better and general energy levels increase ten fold.
Eating more consistently
Right after the realization that we need more calories in our day, most of us will begin to place a focus on eating more calories consistently. This stage can tend to take a bit longer to uncover. It means hitting whatever target number you are supposed to be hitting, more than 80% of the time.
If calories change as little as 100-300, it can make a huge impact on our body’s ability to function correctly. Eating more can have an impact on things like sleep, hair and moods. But it can still be hindering inward changes if the amount is not high enough. It can be the difference in eating 400 calories more than you used to, but not eating at your maintenance (TDEE) level.
Paying attention to macros
Once it becomes easier to consistently hit that calorie number, the next focus shifts to hitting your macros. Macronutrients such as protein, fat and carbohydrates are the main three your focus should be on. Fiber is also a consideration especially when it comes to your carbs. In the beginning, your focus is just getting your calories up to your proper amount. But eventually the shift needs to change to focus on hitting these macros in order to get the right balance of nutrients needed to sustain fat loss.
It is easier to focus on hitting these numbers when your calorie level is high, making it easier to keep hitting them when you cut your calories.
Lifting weights
In the beginning, it is easy to just workout with whatever program or cardio class you enjoy doing. Going from couch to 4 days a week will certainly help you to see fat loss happen, but soon the results slow down or stop all together. This is when the realization that lifting weights is now needed in order to continue seeing that fat loss happen. It might be something you had heard about earlier in your journey, but this blind spot tends to hide until you are ready to fully commit to a strength training program.
Lift heavier weights
The final stage to fat loss is understanding that lifting weights is not just lifting a certain amount and stopping. It is constantly and consistently working on increasing the amount you lift. As you adjust to the weight level you lift, this becomes normal to your body. Therefore the benefits stall out and you plateau. By consistently challenging your muscles with heavier weights, it will always be working overtime to benefit from these levels.
While these stages can happen in any order to an individual, most uncover them in order – at their own pace. As a new “blindspot” is revealed to you, lean in…don’t rush it, or attempt to avoid it. Truly understand what each stage means to you and spend the time needed in each one before working through the next.
Beginning the Diet Mentality Cycle
Taking back my life
Increasing calories is an important aspect of building muscle. As we discussed in a previous 
A winter reset (eating at maintenance) actually helps your metabolism to heal, giving your body a good amount of time to “remember” where TDEE is before another cut is attempted. During this time, many in the fam will choose to eat in surplus of their TDEE (Bulk). 
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